Monday, October 31, 2011

A Hallowe'en Poem from Jackie Awerman

You may recognize Jackie's name from one of the many articles she's had published over the years. Jackie is a talented knitter and a writer who we're very happy is a loyal Yarnmarket customer. She sent us this poem to celebrate Hallowe'en and I thought I'd share it with you.

WONDER WITCH OF CANDY & YARN
By Jackie Awerman, October 2011

Out of the blackish haze
Of a swampy daze
Cuttin’ through vile green smoke
This ain’t a joke:
A frog cries warnings with a mighty croak
And you see the flash of purple britches
The orange petticoat
Then you hear the nuck, nuck of an old, old
Very old billy goat.

There’s a whir and a whistle
A screech and a click
You’re quite sure that it isn’t..it couldn’t be
St. Nick.
Nope not his kind of deed. Not at mach speed…
Not whoopin’ and hollerin’ “ I need…I need…”
So you look up in the trees…you look down by your knees..
It’s …OMG! Bats almighty!
She’s out in her nightie…
The Wonder Witch!

Yup. Here she comes…Varooming through…
Incantations blasting…
And so darn skinny she must’ve been fasting
…Getting ready…
Oh so hungry
For your treats.
Up to her amazing broomstick feats.
Oh! Oh! Say it isn't so
Wonder Witch
Has the candy 'n yarn itch!

Oy. Hold on to your treat & knitting bags
Don’t …please don’t let that greedy hag
Grab your candy, grope your stash…
There’s another solution—you can do in a flash!
I swear...Hallowe'en salvation is almost here!

Here’s what to do instead:
Wrap a skein of glorious yarn around your head
You know…from your special stash under the bed.
Then cast a spell so all will be well:
Wonder Witch will lose the itch for your yarn and candy
It's guaranteed. It's gonna be dandy.

C’mon. Get to it at full speed. Pick up your favorite knitting needles
And recite the Knitter's Moon spell with me:
Cats MEOW.
Monsters BOW.
Away WONDER WITCH.
Away Candy ‘n Yarn ITCH
Take this Gorgeous yarn instead
From my heart…off my head
And I’m giving you candy—plenty of that
Enough to stuff your knitted hat.

Now, pointing your knitting needles straight at
The Witch,
Take a deep breath and finish the rhyme:
Oopsie, loopsie glittery slime
Jittery cats sipping wine
My treats are mine.

Candy 'n yarn itch...Wonder Witch
You're outta here...outta here...
So there.
Amen! Whew! And hurray!
Now if I can knit in peace this Hallowe'en Day!

Smiles and laughter...Yarn Dancing aroudn the bonfire of old dilapidated knitting books and patterns gone awry.